Astral Journey
by Starberry-Cupcake
Summary: Darcy makes an astral journey to the enemy ship to see Jez and finds out his true feelings...after "Blood Captain" but without counting "Black Heart" or "Empire of Night"


**Disclaimer: **I do not own Vampirates...If I did, I think I wouldn't have named it that way D: I dunno

**Pairing: **Jez x Darcy

**Raiting: **K+

**Moment it takes place in the story: **After "Blood Captain", not counting anything that happens after it...meaning "Black Heart" and/or Empire of Night" never existed...because I wrote this before reading any of them...so you get the point

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**Astral Journey**

He woke up in the middle of the night. Again. This wasn't the first (and wasn't going to be the last) time he did so. The ship was moving faster that he remembered it did before he went to sleep, but he didn't remember when that was either. He just remembered _her_. He had dreamt about her once more, and the dream was always so real, he felt he could embrace her and feel her smell, touch her curls, caress her cheek and kiss her lips once more. He wanted to do it more than he wanted blood, but he couldn't allow himself to admit that in front of other vampirates, in front of Johnny or Sidorio. For his crew she was just a piece of wood. She was in the mornings, when she transformed into the figurehead of the ship he was previously in, _The Nocturne_. But at night she was his Darcy, the one he missed, the one he desired, the one he loved.

He often wondered about how she would be doing that night, did she miss him like he did? Did she think of him despite what happened between them, despite his choice? Did she hate him? He wished to the night sky she didn't, she never did. He knew it was possible, of course, more than possible, it was pretty sure. But, if there was any kind of reminiscent feeling in her, he would be happy. He wanted more than anything that a part of her belonged to him forever, just as his heart was really her's, in the dark secret of the night sky. He remembered her eyes, when they stared at him with love and desire, with jealousy when he was with his former and recently deceased donor. The one he killed. And with that memory came back the other eyes, those filled with tears, dissapointment and pain, the last ones he saw. He made his choice, but he would have given anything for her to understand, to share his feelings.

He was always a ladies man, it wasn't as if he had never had a crush on a girl before, but Darcy…she was different. She couldn't be compared to anyone. That was what he told Shanti right before…He didn't want to remember those eyes again. Not tonight. Tonight he wanted to remember her when she was his.

* * *

Darcy was wondering in the deck of _The Nocturne_, staring at the night sky. She thought of him. She couldn't help it, as much as she tried, as much as she called him a traitor and a liar. She couldn't. She thought he was her true love so, how was that easy to forget? He must be laughing with joy in that ship, with many other girls around him, already forgotten her. That was probably how it was.

But, then, why didn't she believe it? What could she do? Maybe if she saw him, if she could see the monster he became, how he forgot her, how well he was doing without her…maybe that pain would take him away from her definitively.

She wasn't entirely sure about how good that idea was, but she had, she needed to try. So she did. She did that astral journey she used with Grace so often and, carefully, she invaded the enemy's ship.

* * *

Jez just couldn't do anything right that night. He didn't feel like it, anyway. Most of the crew had gone to kill, steal, drink, he didn't know what, and didn't care that night. It was in that silent deck only surrounded by wind that he saw her. She was silently walking towards the opposite side of the deck, as if she was looking for something. At first he thought it was his mind, playing tricks on him, but if it was a fantasy, she would be walking towards him, looking happy, not…scared, like she was now.

- Darcy? – he hesitated before calling her name, worried he may scare her away.

She froze, still turning her back to him. Slowly she turned to face him, with her eyes filled with surprise and fear, and a little hint of something else. Something good, that tasted like hope. She was more beautiful than he remembered, especially underneath the moon.

- I… - she seemed to not know what to say – I'm leaving. – she said, closing her eyes.

- No! – Jez shouted, taking her hand and being unable to grab her.

She opened her eyes. She was in an astral journey.

- Don't leave, not now. – he said, supplicant – Please. Why did you come?

- I… - she frowned – I just wanted to figure something out.

- About me? – he did half a smile, without it being he's intention.

- Don't feel flattered, Stukeley. – she said, seriously.

She never called him that. Not that way. He was her "Mr. Jetsam", wasn´t he?

- Sorry. – he couldn't disguise his dissapointment – I was just hoping out loud.

- Oh, please! – she seemed angry – as if you were thinking of me, as if you missed me!

She had no idea. How couldn't she sense his eager to feel her again?

- Darcy, of course I did. And I still do. All the time. – he came closer to her.

- You didn't seem so sure when you left the "Nocturne" with Sidorio and his crew…

- I just don't agree with the Captain's way of life…I think…I don't really know what I think anymore…

- You made your choice. – Darcy sounded more sad than angry, more nostalgic than disappointed.

- Why are you here, then? Why are you in this deck if you don't trust there's still some feelings for you in my heart? – he looked at her in the eyes, hoping he could actually touch her – You know there are feelings for you in my heart because you still have feelings for me in yours, don't you?

He sounded more sure than he actually was, but the hope he felt was increasing with each second. She didn't have anything to lose in this afterlife but her…and he already had.

- Is there? – she avoided his sight – Is there really something left in your heart for me?

- Darcy, my love, - he smiled – it is all yours.

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She couldn't let herself believe in those words. He seemed truthful, though, honest and loving; but he seemed so before and that led her to no good. So what to believe? In her heart or in her head?

- Tell me how do you feel, love. – he did as if he intended to caress her cheek but didn't.

- I don't know… - she thought her words before making another mistake – I honestly don't think that what I feel is what I should…not this time…last time I made a mistake. – she looked at him with sadness and regret, hoping that the situation was different and things were easier than they were.

* * *

Jez didn't know how to show her he was being honest, but even if he did, what would change? He couldn't go back to her and she wasn't going to go with him either. Still, he wanted something more…

- I'll tell you what, Darcy, - he sighed – let's be honest just for tonight, just for a second…I'll tell you how I feel, even if we can't be together, even if you leave now and never come back, even if our paths never cross again. – he looked at her in the eyes, reflecting the moon that was shining avobe them – I love you, Darcy Flotsam, I love you with all my heart.

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Darcy felt her soul alive again, like if it needed that to go back to work. She new, though, that she couldn't fool herself with lost hopes of things that could never be, she new that it was pointless to try to embrace hope once again, but just for that second, just in that moment, she could let her heart pretend.

- I love you too, Mr. Jetsam. – she let herself give him a shy smile, one she knew she would regret but she couldn't stop from escaping her – I wish I didn't but I do.

- I'd kiss you if I could, you know. – he smirked.

- Lets make it our goodbye seal then. – she leaned foreward and let her transparent lips brush his, as she dissapeared from the deck of the enemy ship and went back to hers.

* * *

An invisible kiss, Jez thought, but was more true than any other he had ever received.

**The End**

**Ok, as I said, I worte this before reading "Black Heart" and "Empire of Night". I hope you've enjoyed it =D**


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